I really don't think I have a problem with him being gay. The concept has never bothered me before. I know as well as you do that I can do nothing to change his mind about stopping being an atheist. The only reason why I mention the brainwashing thing is that I know a lot of these universities do this. They speak out against Christianity and teach you to accept other doctrines and anything but Christianity. As far as my girlfriend's parents are concerned, I've only heard stories about them from my girlfriend. They hate my guts without a cause and they won't even accept me into their family so I'm pretty much screwed there until some miracle occurs...which in my own humble opinion, I don't see anything changing soon because of how much hatred I've seen them harbor towards me. :/

Thank you for your feedback Lori. This is really going to help me. I may have to listen to Joyce Meyer myself. I need to start listening or watching more sermons online. I only get to have one weekend off per month so I can only go to church once per month. The rest of the time I always work on Sundays.

I’m doing the best I can right now. I’m nowhere near perfect and I mess up with sin quite a bit, but hopefully God will have mercy on my soul and maybe He won’t send me to Hell if I can’t get free of some of these addictions. To be honest I don’t want them and if I could get free from Kratom and chewing tobacco then I would, but it’s hold on me is too powerful and no matter how hard I try I can’t seem to break it.

Also I’m not sure if God is necessarily saying no to my prayer requests. I just don’t think God can do some things but if He can then He’s limited in what He can do. For example my ultimate dream is to be united with my girlfriend, but her parents are extremely mean and hateful people and they despise me without a cause. God might only be able to help persuade a person to change but He cannot go beyond a person’s free will. So it might be that I’m going to have to wait for her mother and father to kick the bucket before we are together. I’ve never had anyone hate me as much I as these people have. They are extremely overprotective of her daughter and won’t let her live her own life. They treat her like a weak and helpless child and I am disgusted by it.

I just wish things could change for us. My girlfriend has a disability so she has to stay with them. We love each other very much and have been together for four and a half years now. You would think that her mom and dad would be convinced by now that I’m not leaving her. And she doesn’t want to leave me. Being in a long distance relationship is very hard but we have always pulled through for each other because we love each other very much. Unless her parents stop hating me then my dream is out of my reach and we are both stuck. It’s disappointing but I would not want to have anyone else as the love of my life because she’s that important to me.

Being without any Kratom at all for a couple of days is torture in itself. If you quit it cold turkey you have terrible withdrawal symptoms. I was without it once for a solid week and that was absolutely horrendous. I’d never felt anything so horrible in my life. I wish the Kratom wouldn’t control me but it does. It’s a very powerful drug. 😫

I really hope so. These people have hated me without a case since day one. And it's all because I'm some guy that my girlfriend met off of Facebook. But I will keep praying...I'll try anyway. I've gotten kind of burned out on it to be honest.