Jesus forgives all that ask for forgiveness, please also forgive yourself. We are human and we all make huge mistakes. Ask Jesus to come into your heart. Have you made the decision to accept Jesus as the Savior and Son of God? If not please do. Once you accept God & Jesus, that will help so much!
If you have, then lean and trust hard on your faith in Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior. God wants us to lean hard on our faith in Him and Jesus. Even if it looks like nothing is happening it is. Patience, faith and prayer. It happens in God’s time and his timing is always right. Try a church in your area too. Prayers Up.