My mother past away last year May 14, 2010. It is really hard for me to accept. She was killed by doctor's/hospital. They allowed her to get a bedsore on her bottom after an amputation. It became badly infected and septic. She fought a hard fight and lost after six months for it took over her body. I wanted God to take her for at the end she was suffering so much but at the same token, I really wasn't ready to let her go. We were so close. I loved her more than I love myself. It is so hard for me to deal with and no matter how hard I try, I just can't get it to settle. No one seems to understand. It hurts so bad. My chest start to tighten. I go to a therapist,I trust in God but, it is just , I don't know how to explain this feeling. Please just pray for me.