I don't want to lose the man I so deeply love. I've never had anyone in my life as calm and gentle as he is. Right now, one of our best friends is dying, and he leaves behind a grieving family and fiancee. I don't even know what it's like to be cherished by someone, so seeing someone die who is so loved is difficult. Our friend has told me the man I hold in my heart loves me as well but has not been able to tell me. (And no, he's not married. That is not the reason.) I pray that circumstances will not tear us apart as one of our friend's dying wishes is for us to take care of each other.
I've been divorced for thirteen years. The last thing my husband said to me was that I'd never find anyone else who would take me. He was abusive, and yet he managed to marry two years after our divorce. I have watched many of my friends and relative marry over this period of time, but no one has come along to love me. I struggle to fave ever problem alone, and all my joys leave me crying because I have no one to share them with. Please pray God would have mercy on me and send me someone who would love me and someone I could help.
I am an only child caring for both my elderly parents. I have a full time job, a second job as an artist/photographer, and a third as co-director of an arts non-profit performance center. I only get about three hours of sleep a night and have no help with my parents, who are both almost immobile. I am struggling to hang on to my art career and the non-profit as they are my only outlets and the things that I work with to use the talents God gave me. My parents do not qualify for in home help. My father has dementia. I cannot take care of all their needs, and my salary is so small I cannot arrange to have extra care in the home. They can't pay for it either. I need prayer support. Sometimes I feel like I am not a person any longer. The only time I feel needed is when I am working with the nonprofit because my mother is only concerned about how much I can do for them and keeps piling things on me to do. I am late for work much of the time because I have to go do things for my parents, and I am regularly called away from the office for some emergency or another. I long to have a life with a mate and a family of my own, but at 55, I'm afraid that will never happen now. In fact, I may have to sell my home to move in with my parents to take care of them. I could get better work but I cannot leave the area because of them and I cannot convince them to move. I am not angry that I have to help out, but I would like to have a bit more life in my life. I would like to feel loved, and that hasn't been the case in years. Some days I think I am becoming mentally unstable. Please pray for their health and for me.
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I’m right there with you, Kerianne. So tired of being alone and lonely. I know I’m fine alone, but when I see my friends and coworkers with their families, I see how much of life I’ve missed.